January 14 2019

By: Jackie Hook
Monday, January 14, 2019

How Do You Speak Grief? As we discussed last week, based on Dr. Gary Chapman’s five love languages, Dr. Alan Wolfelt believes we each have one of five preferred ways for others to support us in our grief. We’ll look at some simple explanations and suggestions for each of these ways.

One preferred way for grievers to be supported is by Receiving Gifts. After a death, people who prefer this love language appreciate flowers with a nice note and/or food tied with a ribbon. They also welcome gifts and kind cards on anniversaries of the heart, such as birthdays, holidays, etc.

A second preferred way for grievers to be supported is by Spending Quality Time Together. Those who prefer this welcome your presence and undivided attention. Spend time with them on a regular basis and be a good listener; you don’t have to say much.

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

November 11 2019

Learning to Listen takes practice. In casual conversation, we listen while also thinking about what we’ll say next. Deep listening means our focus is solely on the speaker. We allow them to say wha...

November 4 2019

This month our theme is “Learn to Listen.” We listen to others all day. But do we really listen or do we just hear? In my work as a spiritual director, celebrant and end-of-life doula, listening is...

October 28 2019

This week we’ll look at the social realm of self-care. Alan Wolfelt’s work encourages finding a grief buddy, recognizing that friends will probably change, and remembering that others also had a sp...

October 21 2019

When we think about the cognitive realm of self-care on the grief journey, that too is as unique as we are. Alan Wolfelt recommends answering these two questions: What do I want? What is wanted of ...

October 14 2019

As we continue this month’s discussion about the uniqueness of self-care, we’ll look at the emotional realm. All kinds of emotions can be a part of our grief journeys. Alan Wolfelt suggests some wa...

October 7 2019

This month our theme is “Self-Care is Unique.” Self-care is always important and when you’re grieving the loss of a loved one it is even more so. Grief takes a lot of energy and can feel like a hea...

September 30 2019

While you’re gaining strength through your grief journey, I encourage you to do as psychotherapist, writer and speaker Candyce Ossefort recommends and understand that needing help is normal: This ...

September 23 2019

The philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, once said, "That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” So I guess in the end, what gives us strength can be the grief itself, even though we would rather ...

September 16 2019

Other things that have given me strength on my grief journeys are my 4-3-2-1-! on Hope, Healing and Wholeness. In my own life and in companioning others, these practices, skills, intentions, postur...

September 9 2019

When I think about what has given me strength for different grief journeys in my life, several words come to mind – faith, belief, trust, love and hope. Albert Einstein once said, “The most importa...