2023 - March - CDT - Good Life - A Grief Education and Support Series

By: Jackie Naginey Hook
Sunday, March 12, 2023

A Grief Education and Support Series

I could see some of the participants holding back tears as we began introductions at the grief education and support group. The invitation was to share their names, a little bit about why they were there, and who they were grieving. Some were raw and shared with tears. Others shared without crying. Neither reaction was “better” than the other. All reactions were welcome.

One woman told me she understood the importance of sharing a piece of her story at each session. It helped her to believe it herself and begin to accept the reality of her loved one’s death. Another said that she would know she’d be ready to stop coming to the group when she could get through her introduction without crying. Although tears are a sign of strength, evidence that the grief is being allowed to move, and something that may visit just like thoughts of loved ones again and again throughout life, I understood the sentiment behind her comment. For this woman, saying the words that her husband died without crying meant to her that she was healing. Over the years, she was not the only person who shared these thoughts with me.

I’ve heard a saying that we have to tell our story 72 times to heal. Obviously, that isn’t scientifically proven, but it speaks to the need to confront our pain by telling the stories. As Paula D’Arcy writes in When People Grieve: Guidance for Grievers and the Friends Who Care, “When that pain finally begins to be integrated, the telling stops.” That is what these group participants intuitively knew. It doesn’t mean they’ll never tell their stories again, but their need to do it and experience it will change in the retelling.

Our upcoming Stories of Loss: Grief Education and Support Series will provide a safe space for bereaved individuals to tell and retell their stories. Stories of Loss is a four-week education and support group on Tuesdays, March 28 through April 18 from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. at Juniper at Brookline, 1950 Cliffside Drive. This group will be facilitated by Brenda Oyler Kim, a social worker at Juniper, and me.

At Stories of Loss, we’ll talk about the grief journey and the importance of sharing stories verbally, through writing, and with creative expression. We’ll also discuss both spending time grieving and spending time engaging with life, as well as healthy ways to continue to bond with deceased loved ones. Reflection words from participants at previous Stories of Loss series include: vulnerability, authenticity, connections, I’m not the only one, friendships, there’s hope, gratitude, compassion, and courage. To register, please email Jackie@JackieHook.com, call 814-237-2712 or visit the Koch Funeral Home Facebook page @kochFH. We hope you will join us!

In addition, we hope you will join us at the following gatherings:

For more information, please visit the Bereavement Gatherings and Events page on the Koch Funeral Home website. To reserve your spot and receive the invitation links, email Jackie@JackieHook.com, call 814-237-2712 or visit the Koch Funeral Home Facebook page @kochFH.

Jackie Naginey Hook, MA, is a spiritual director, celebrant and end-of-life doula.  She coordinates the Helping Grieving Hearts Heal program through Koch Funeral Home in State College.  For more information, please call 814-237-2712 or visit www.kochfuneralhome.com.

 

 

 

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:
Please enter the numbers and letters you see in the image. Note that the case of the letters entered matters.

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

2023 - August - Gazette - Surrender Your Soul

Surrender Your Soul A couple of weeks ago, I stepped onto the deck of our cabin at Emerald Lake in Yoho National Park, British Columbia. It was early morning and the sun had just risen from behind...

2023 - August - CDT - Helping Hands - Bereavement Gatherings and Events

Bereavement Gatherings & Events Anne Frank wrote, “The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely, or unhappy is to go outside. . . I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troubles...

2023 - July - CDT - Learning to Live: What's Your Story?

“Helping” Someone Who is Grieving I answered the phone and could tell the caller was unsettled. A relationship and job possibility had both ended for him. Grief had come for a visit, but I didn’t ...

2023 - July - CDT - Helping Hands - "Helping" Someone Who is Grieving

“Helping” Someone Who is Grieving I answered the phone and could tell the caller was unsettled. A relationship and job possibility had both ended for him. Grief had come for a visit, but I didn’t ...

2023 - July - Gazette - Death is the Memory of the Living

Death is the Memory of the Living My sister-in-law passed away a year ago. Last week on the anniversary date my thoughts returned to all the events that led up to that fateful day. Our heads remem...

2023 - June - Gazette - What Is Enough?

What Is Enough? What is enough? During a recent gathering for elders, I posed this question to the group and was impressed by the wise answers. One woman said that as far as “stuff” was concerned,...

2023 - June - CDT - Helping Hands - End-of-Life Doula

“Dance . . . is about intention, and not about the specific movements or actions themselves.” When I read these words in Anna Halprin and Rachel Kaplan’s book Making Dances That Matter, they remind...

2023 - May - Gazette - Med-KNIT-ations

Med-Knit-ations There was a lot going on in my world one day a few weeks ago. My 92-year-old father was in the hospital with heart issues, and I had two presentations to make that day at the local...

2023 - April - Gazette - Bereaved Mother's Day

Bereaved Mother’s Day I used to dread Mother’s Day. Of course I was always very grateful for my mother and wanted to celebrate her. But during the years when my husband and I were dealing with fer...

2023 - March - Gazette - Going Home

Going Home “Going home is powerful.” F. Glenn Fleming, Koch Funeral Home funeral director and supervisor, shared these words at a recent community presentation for those interested in preparing f...