March 19 2018

By: Jackie Hook
Monday, March 19, 2018

Today, we’ll continue to look at how families make it matter by adding exclamation points to the ways they care for their loved ones at death. This can be done in many ways. They can have a ceremony and share pieces of their loved one’s life story. They can include favorite poems, readings and music. They can bring personal items to share, including pictures, tribute videos and other memorabilia. The options are endless.

If the family doesn’t want a full ceremony, they can have a remembrance service. When someone we care about dies, we have an innate need to come together and tell the stories of their life. It is an important part of the healing process to set aside this time and create a space to remember. A remembrance service is a smaller, more intimate gathering with opportunities to say things that otherwise may not be said. In one such gathering I facilitated, an “ex-family” member shared how grateful they were to have still been included in this family. From the reactions of those gathered, it was clear this sentiment had never been shared before. 

(First printed in the Gazette on February 22, 2018)

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

July 16 2018

Shifting Your Connection is a topic I appreciate discussing with individuals. Many mourners are afraid of being judged for wanting to continue bonds with their deceased loved ones and they’re so gr...

July 9 2018

When I introduced Shifting Your Connection last week, I spoke about how the continuing bonds theory allowed for grievers to continue relationships with their deceased loved ones instead of striving...

July 2 2018

July’s theme is Shifting Your Connection. When a loved one dies, grievers used to be encouraged to “let go” of the relationship with the deceased. After the 1996 release of the book Continuing Bond...

June 25 2018

We invite you to engage in creative expressions. Write a story, create something, listen to music and/or whenever you see something that expresses how you feel, take a picture of it. The options ar...

June 18 2018

If you’re interested in the science behind creative expression and healing, see this research summary: In 2010, a review of existing literature on the benefits of the arts (music, visual arts, dan...

June 11 2018

As we continue with our theme of The Artistry of Grief, below are some reasons why creative expression is healing: Creative expression is engaging ​Positive Psychologist Martin Seligman suggest...

June 4 2018

June’s theme is The Artistry of Grief. When you’re grieving, you may not feel like an artist, but the movement of the grief through you and your expression of it can be a creative process. Grief is...

May 28 2018

In addition to safe communities, there are countless other ways to nurture yourself and others. We hope you too find many gifts along the way. As I said in the first blog post this month, you begin...

May 21 2018

Before and after a loved one’s death, nurturing yourself is critically important. Nurturing can come in a variety of forms, so where do you begin? As is evident in the story of the patriarch we sh...

May 14 2018

As we continue with our theme of Nurturing, Where Do You Begin and the story of the patriarch who died, the gifts from nurturing continued. All of the patriarch’s grown children had returned home t...