September 11 2017

By: Jackie Hook
Monday, September 11, 2017

As we continue looking at holding on or letting go of guilt and blame, I think of a grief education and support group I facilitated a few years ago. At one meeting, a woman shared some regrets she had concerning her loved one’s death. After she spoke, another member told the group that she was struck by the first woman’s use of the word regret. Hearing “regret” reframed her experiences with her own husband’s death. Instead of saying, “I feel guilty…,” this second woman was now going to say, “I regret…”  That one word made all the difference for her. She let go of the guilt she had been feeling. There is a difference between guilt and regret. Perhaps you want to consider regret as well? 

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

January 24 2022

When we think about nurturing our grief one step at a time, it’s important to make sure we include our different dimensions – physical, cognitive, spiritual and emotional. Some ideas from author an...

January 17 2021

As I said last week, I was once a La Leche League leader helping mothers with their breastfeeding relationships with their children. So many times mothers were conflicted about how to best meet the...

January 10 2022

Continuing with our theme, “Nurturing One Step at a Time,” as we discussed last week, nurture comes from the Latin root nutrire which means “to suckle” or “to nourish.” When I was a younger mother,...

January 3 2022

This month our theme is “Nurturing One Step at a Time.” According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, ‘It's no coincidence that nurture is a synonym of nourish—both are derived from the Latin verb nutri...

December 27 2021

Here’s a poem to ponder about quiet from Sufi mystic and poet, Rumi: Inside this new love, die. Your way begins on the other side. Become the sky. Take an axe to the prison wall. Escape. Walk out ...

December 20 2021

French mathematician Blaise Pascal, “All man’s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone.” But in some cases, it isn’t the quiet that is disturbing, it is the loneliness. If ...

December 13 2021

I’ve had the privilege of spending retreat time in quiet. At the beginning I resist the quiet, but by the end I’m in sync with it. I often ask quiet what it has to say to me and then I listen....

December 6 2021

This month our theme is “Dear Quiet.” My relationship with quiet has changed so much over the years. I remember when I moved into my apartment after college graduation. It was the first time I ever...

November 29 2021

I’ll leave you this month with a poem by Marilyn Chandler McEntyre that incorporates the concepts of grief, gratitude and grace. How to Recognize Grace It takes you by surprise It comes in odd pa...

November 22 2021

Including a practice of gratitude on your grief journey can be transformative. It might not feel like something you want to do, but if you set an intention to heal, it can help you move forward. So...