January 14 2019

By: Jackie Hook
Monday, January 14, 2019

How Do You Speak Grief? As we discussed last week, based on Dr. Gary Chapman’s five love languages, Dr. Alan Wolfelt believes we each have one of five preferred ways for others to support us in our grief. We’ll look at some simple explanations and suggestions for each of these ways.

One preferred way for grievers to be supported is by Receiving Gifts. After a death, people who prefer this love language appreciate flowers with a nice note and/or food tied with a ribbon. They also welcome gifts and kind cards on anniversaries of the heart, such as birthdays, holidays, etc.

A second preferred way for grievers to be supported is by Spending Quality Time Together. Those who prefer this welcome your presence and undivided attention. Spend time with them on a regular basis and be a good listener; you don’t have to say much.

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

October 25 2021

Memories can play a part of our grief experience in the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual realms. I leave you this month with words from writer and priest, Henri Nouwen: It is very importa...

October 18 2021

Sometimes memories of our loved ones are painful. Perhaps the manner of their death, disagreements we had or unfinished conversations to name a few. Mental health providers are a great resource to ...

October 11 2021

As we continue our conversation about cherishing memories, my work provides me with the gift of hearing many cherished memories. I’ve shared many spaces with people grieving loved ones and when the...

October 4 2021

This month our theme is “Cherishing Memories.” Alan Wolfelt, Ph.D., considers remembering the person who died as one of the needs of mourners. You move from a relationship of presence to a relation...

September 27 2021

As we close out this month’s discussion of “Mustering Courage in Loss,” I invite you do as poet John O’Donohue suggests and engage the danger and the wildness in your own heart, even when your hear...

September 20 2021

I really appreciate this line from poet Alice Mackenzie Swaim, “Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow.” That is what it take...

September 13 2021

As we talk more about mustering courage in loss, let’s begin with the etymology of the words muster and courage. According to https://www.etymonline.com, the word muster means, "to display, reveal,...

September 6 2021

This month our theme is “Mustering Courage in Loss.” This is a very appropriate theme as we honor the 20th anniversary of 9-11. Koch Funeral Home was working with Alpha Fire Company to hold a Remem...

August 30 2021

For our final “Life with Tears and Laughter” themed post this month, I offer the poem, “The Guest House,” by Rumi, a 13th century Persian poet, scholar, theologian and Sufi mystic. This being huma...

August 23 2021

People often ask me how I take care of myself since my work involves life with tears and laughter. One of the things I do is allow myself to freely express my tears and laughter. I’ve learned that ...